Hi Bennett Bloggers, Just a quick hello and I am looking forward to many additions to this blog. Thanks Elaine for setting it up. Can you believe 50 years have flown by? I'm not any older, are you? It's funny how I can remember events from 50 years ago and yet what happened last week is a blur. So many memories have been awakened just by reading and responding to the e-mails I have gotten lately from some old friends. Stay well, happy and safe. Eva (There were only 2 Eva's in the class of '59)
First, kudos to Elaine for making this blog happen. I've been part of a couple of email strings started because of the reunion and connected with a few friends of yesteryear. What a lot of fun. The nostalgia is overwhelming. I very seldom look at the numbers that signify the years that have gone by and when I see 50 and then my own 66 it seems bizarre. My mind thinks I'm still 29, though my body tells me the truth.
I'm not sure just how to jump in so I'm going to watch as this begins to develop and then it is going to be wonderful to start to reconnect with some wonderful friends.
Herm (Eva, there was only one Hermie in the class of '59):)
This is a WONDERFUL idea and I thank Elaine so much for setting this up. I have really enjoyed hearing from so many classmates after all of these years. I can't wait for the reunion next July. It seems hard to believe that it is only 10 months from now. We started the planning about a year ago. Will be in touch. Judy Zent Deck
Hi everyone, Thanks for the nice words, but I have to give the credit to my husband, He is the computer geru in the family and everytime I need help he does it (which doesn't help me learn what to do). I have been wroking on the reunion committee and it has been fun renewing old friendships. Hope more will be joining this venue for the discussions. oh-Go Bills!! Elaine
Hello Class of '59. I'm just back from the Bris of my newest grandchild and found this waiting for me. I'm not even sure how to "get into" a blog, but I'm enjoying hearing everything from all who've written. Thank you Elaine's husband and much thanks to Carla for starting the whole communications thing in the first place. Linda Weiss Baruch
Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)? San Diego CA
How long have you lived there? 32 years
Family members? Husband – Harvey married 48 years
Children – Susan age 45, married, Pharm. D. U of Stockton (CA) met her husband in pharmacy school. Lives in CA near Sacramento. 2 daughters ages 14 and 9 years.
Diane age 43, married abd Ancient Near East Studies, grad schools Harvard and Brandeis. Lives near Boston where she helps with husband’s opthamology practice. 1 son and 2 daughters ages 9, 6, and 4 years.
Nancy age 41, single, is dating regularly and says she likes her single life. (that’s just fine with mom and dad). Master’s in Human Resource Mgt. from Boston U. Lives near San Diego. Works for Hewlett Packard.
Communities, Affiliations, Occupations etc. The first year I moved to San Diego I became VP of the local NOW chapter. Although I remain a feminist, that early experience gave me a clear view of the imperfections and ironies of human motives; e.g. NOW members who were ongoing victims of spousal abuse, internal power and status conflicts, lack of recognition (at the time – 1976) of ethnic and cultural differences (values reflected a narrow middle class white focus).
While still living in Williamsville, at age 30 with 3 kids I had returned to school at SUNYAB for my master’s degree in Counseling Education. I had a great part time job at the University’s Adult Counseling Center where I counseled individuals and groups regarding the adjustments required of adults returning to school (I knew this subject well from personal experience.)
In San Diego, I created a course for women who wanted or needed to return to the job market after being at home for a period of time. The course ran intermittently for several years through the Adult Education Dept at UCSD in La Jolla and involved vocational testing, resume prep, and practical advice from guest speakers. It was a great activity for me as a Page 2 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
new resident of the area. I met many interesting people while researching and choosing appropriate speakers.
I have had several careers over the years. In the 1970’s and 80’s I worked in the Jewish Community; first at the JCC with senior adults (who knew I would get there myself so fast?). Then as area director of the local American Jewish Committee chapter which was in shambles at the time. I managed to build it up, a proud achievement which maintains to this day. I also managed to burn myself out and took some time off.
One activity that I continued was my participation as co-founder and ass’t director of The Woman’s Institute for Continuing Jewish Education. This was the brainchild and doctoral project of my friend Irene Fine. Through the auspices of the JCC we taught and arranged classes on religious and secular topics of interest to Jewish women. Our highlight was our annual series of 3 Saturday (Shabbat) afternoon study sessions each with a different Jewish woman scholar. The Woman’s Institute published original prayerbooks, hosted an interfaith conference with the U of San Diego (a Catholic university) on female images of God, and created and published new ceremonies that recognized the lifecycle events important to Jewish women, I myself with Irene’s guidance wrote and presented to 100 women, a midlife ceremony when I turned 40 (so young! I think now). This ceremony is mentioned in a book by Letty Cottin Pogrebin, “Getting Over Getting Older’”. Having achieved it’s goals of actively involving women in their own spiritual lives, the Institute was retired after 25 years with printed materials archived in the Jewish Studies dep’t of San Diego State University.
I went back to work in 1990 as an outreach worker for a private foster care program which was part of a multi-service agency that served needy kids. The foster care program was contracted with the county but offered a higher level of care for hard to place children. These were kids who had bounced around the system, had behavior problems, and/or physical disabilities. We were licensed by the state and were reimbursed at a higher rate than the county. This allowed us to provided better training and supervision of foster parents, psychological therapy and other services for the kids. I became director of the program in 1991 with a staff of 30, 100 kids in placement and 50 foster families. Gradually I became frustrated with some agency policies that were imposing on the quality of services. I decided to form my own little non-profit, got a board together, got licensed, and persuaded 2 social workers and a secretary to come with me. The new program was called Special Families. It was financed by my truly wonderful husband. After 2 years we were just starting to become financially independent when I got an unsolicited offer from another agency to buy out Special Families. This offered an opportunity to return all of my husband’s hard-earned money and also provide in-house services to our kids which we had been out-sourcing. My board approved the merger and I went to work for the new agency as director of foster care and a small non-public school for behaviorally challenged kids. It was satisfying and exhausting and I finally retired in 2000.
Continuing education\personal growth As a retiree I decided to earn the Ph.D I always wanted. A neighbor who was a retired professor suggested that I look into online programs and mentioned Walden University. I researched this and when I found that there was a (loose) connection to a recognized regular university (Indiana U) I signed on. For 3 years I studied public policy online and at seminars at IU and other locations. I did well, enjoyed the work and learned a lot…especially about the work I had been doing in foster care. I finished all of the coursework and began the process of choosing my dissertation topic etc. I found that I had a lot of resistance and couldn’t seem to get it to flow. I knew generally who I needed to hook up with locally to gather research material. They were people I knew and liked, and still I just couldn’t work up my enthusiasm. I finally did something I had never done. I quit! And it was ok, really ok. Page 3 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
I got what I needed and now I was ready to read a book for pleasure, play on my computer, swim as often as I liked, experiment with healthy cooking, lunch with friends etc. I’m still enjoying life!
What was the greatest gift you’ve received? Many. I have been very fortunate. First a great spouse who rode the ups and downs with me (and vice versa). 3 intelligent, productive daughters all with a highly developed sense of humor. And they care about people and the world around them. I’m very proud. An enquiring mind. I’m curious. I love to learn. I am able to change and grow although this can be painful sometimes. This natural tendency I have to play out my life issues through my volunteer and work activities: (for ex.) • The limits placed on women I saw as I was growing up • The ability to use my anguish over losing a parent early by understanding the problems that foster kids have and actually doing something about those problems.
And of course I am so fortunate to be living in weather paradise after putting in over 30 years in the cold tundra of Buffalo! (although Buffalo will always be home to me).
You have Bennett to be thankful for what? I went to Bennett at a difficult time in my personal life. Bennett gave me a normalcy I didn’t feel at home. I was proud to go to Bennett which was respected academically and provided extra goodies like Bob Wells and the surprise assemblies with a celebrity thrown in. I was comfortably surrounded by friends and familiar faces. The Tiger’s football games provided excitement and feelings of belonging. I knew who I was at Bennett and where I fit in. Even after all these years I still feel lucky to be a Bennett alum. When you meet someone who went to Bennett even in different years, there is an instant connection. I talk to other people and don’t often see this level of affection and connection I and so many others have with BHS.
Has our motto been significant in your life? “The Best is Yet to Be”. Yes. I am the kind of person who sees the glass half full. I guess I can say that I have lived optimistically; trying to find my way around problems. Not to sound Pollyanna – ish because I have had my miserable times. But I do believe that you need to keep going; to continue to love and learn in order to really live. With global warming, a sinking economy, high fuel prices etc. the only way to survive is to think that the best is yet to be.
WHAT SHOULD WE AS A CLASS HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH? There is a Hebrew word, “teshuvah” which introduces the concept of healing the world. Does this world need healing? Of course! It may sound like an impossible task but all it takes is for people to come together for the purpose of helping. Whether it’s the BHS Alumni Association that helps today’s students or another affiliation, large or small, it is imperative that everyone contributes something of themselves to helping other people. A suggestion: It would be tremendously uplifting to be able to see a written record of good deeds performed by the people who make up the class of ’59.
Due to some health problems I won’t be able to attend the 50th festivities in Buffalo. But I will feel included and will derive great pleasure from learning about all of my (to quote Carla) mates
Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)? San Diego CA
How long have you lived there? 32 years
Family members? Husband – Harvey married 48 years
Children – Susan age 45, married, Pharm. D. U of Stockton (CA) met her husband in pharmacy school. Lives in CA near Sacramento. 2 daughters ages 14 and 9 years.
Diane age 43, married abd Ancient Near East Studies, grad schools Harvard and Brandeis. Lives near Boston where she helps with husband’s opthamology practice. 1 son and 2 daughters ages 9, 6, and 4 years.
Nancy age 41, single, is dating regularly and says she likes her single life. (that’s just fine with mom and dad). Master’s in Human Resource Mgt. from Boston U. Lives near San Diego. Works for Hewlett Packard.
Communities, Affiliations, Occupations etc. The first year I moved to San Diego I became VP of the local NOW chapter. Although I remain a feminist, that early experience gave me a clear view of the imperfections and ironies of human motives; e.g. NOW members who were ongoing victims of spousal abuse, internal power and status conflicts, lack of recognition (at the time – 1976) of ethnic and cultural differences (values reflected a narrow middle class white focus).
While still living in Williamsville, at age 30 with 3 kids I had returned to school at SUNYAB for my master’s degree in Counseling Education. I had a great part time job at the University’s Adult Counseling Center where I counseled individuals and groups regarding the adjustments required of adults returning to school (I knew this subject well from personal experience.)
In San Diego, I created a course for women who wanted or needed to return to the job market after being at home for a period of time. The course ran intermittently for several years through the Adult Education Dept at UCSD in La Jolla and involved vocational testing, resume prep, and practical advice from guest speakers. It was a great activity for me as a Page 2 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
new resident of the area. I met many interesting people while researching and choosing appropriate speakers.
I have had several careers over the years. In the 1970’s and 80’s I worked in the Jewish Community; first at the JCC with senior adults (who knew I would get there myself so fast?). Then as area director of the local American Jewish Committee chapter which was in shambles at the time. I managed to build it up, a proud achievement which maintains to this day. I also managed to burn myself out and took some time off.
One activity that I continued was my participation as co-founder and ass’t director of The Woman’s Institute for Continuing Jewish Education. This was the brainchild and doctoral project of my friend Irene Fine. Through the auspices of the JCC we taught and arranged classes on religious and secular topics of interest to Jewish women. Our highlight was our annual series of 3 Saturday (Shabbat) afternoon study sessions each with a different Jewish woman scholar. The Woman’s Institute published original prayerbooks, hosted an interfaith conference with the U of San Diego (a Catholic university) on female images of God, and created and published new ceremonies that recognized the lifecycle events important to Jewish women, I myself with Irene’s guidance wrote and presented to 100 women, a midlife ceremony when I turned 40 (so young! I think now). This ceremony is mentioned in a book by Letty Cottin Pogrebin, “Getting Over Getting Older’”. Having achieved it’s goals of actively involving women in their own spiritual lives, the Institute was retired after 25 years with printed materials archived in the Jewish Studies dep’t of San Diego State University.
I went back to work in 1990 as an outreach worker for a private foster care program which was part of a multi-service agency that served needy kids. The foster care program was contracted with the county but offered a higher level of care for hard to place children. These were kids who had bounced around the system, had behavior problems, and/or physical disabilities. We were licensed by the state and were reimbursed at a higher rate than the county. This allowed us to provided better training and supervision of foster parents, psychological therapy and other services for the kids. I became director of the program in 1991 with a staff of 30, 100 kids in placement and 50 foster families. Gradually I became frustrated with some agency policies that were imposing on the quality of services. I decided to form my own little non-profit, got a board together, got licensed, and persuaded 2 social workers and a secretary to come with me. The new program was called Special Families. It was financed by my truly wonderful husband. After 2 years we were just starting to become financially independent when I got an unsolicited offer from another agency to buy out Special Families. This offered an opportunity to return all of my husband’s hard-earned money and also provide in-house services to our kids which we had been out-sourcing. My board approved the merger and I went to work for the new agency as director of foster care and a small non-public school for behaviorally challenged kids. It was satisfying and exhausting and I finally retired in 2000.
Continuing education\personal growth As a retiree I decided to earn the Ph.D I always wanted. A neighbor who was a retired professor suggested that I look into online programs and mentioned Walden University. I researched this and when I found that there was a (loose) connection to a recognized regular university (Indiana U) I signed on. For 3 years I studied public policy online and at seminars at IU and other locations. I did well, enjoyed the work and learned a lot…especially about the work I had been doing in foster care. I finished all of the coursework and began the process of choosing my dissertation topic etc. I found that I had a lot of resistance and couldn’t seem to get it to flow. I knew generally who I needed to hook up with locally to gather research material. They were people I knew and liked, and still I just couldn’t work up my enthusiasm. I finally did something I had never done. I quit! And it was ok, really ok. Page 3 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
I got what I needed and now I was ready to read a book for pleasure, play on my computer, swim as often as I liked, experiment with healthy cooking, lunch with friends etc. I’m still enjoying life!
What was the greatest gift you’ve received? Many. I have been very fortunate. First a great spouse who rode the ups and downs with me (and vice versa). 3 intelligent, productive daughters all with a highly developed sense of humor. And they care about people and the world around them. I’m very proud. An enquiring mind. I’m curious. I love to learn. I am able to change and grow although this can be painful sometimes. This natural tendency I have to play out my life issues through my volunteer and work activities: (for ex.) • The limits placed on women I saw as I was growing up • The ability to use my anguish over losing a parent early by understanding the problems that foster kids have and actually doing something about those problems.
And of course I am so fortunate to be living in weather paradise after putting in over 30 years in the cold tundra of Buffalo! (although Buffalo will always be home to me).
You have Bennett to be thankful for what? I went to Bennett at a difficult time in my personal life. Bennett gave me a normalcy I didn’t feel at home. I was proud to go to Bennett which was respected academically and provided extra goodies like Bob Wells and the surprise assemblies with a celebrity thrown in. I was comfortably surrounded by friends and familiar faces. The Tiger’s football games provided excitement and feelings of belonging. I knew who I was at Bennett and where I fit in. Even after all these years I still feel lucky to be a Bennett alum. When you meet someone who went to Bennett even in different years, there is an instant connection. I talk to other people and don’t often see this level of affection and connection I and so many others have with BHS.
Has our motto been significant in your life? “The Best is Yet to Be”. Yes. I am the kind of person who sees the glass half full. I guess I can say that I have lived optimistically; trying to find my way around problems. Not to sound Pollyanna – ish because I have had my miserable times. But I do believe that you need to keep going; to continue to love and learn in order to really live. With global warming, a sinking economy, high fuel prices etc. the only way to survive is to think that the best is yet to be.
WHAT SHOULD WE AS A CLASS HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH? There is a Hebrew word, “teshuvah” which introduces the concept of healing the world. Does this world need healing? Of course! It may sound like an impossible task but all it takes is for people to come together for the purpose of helping. Whether it’s the BHS Alumni Association that helps today’s students or another affiliation, large or small, it is imperative that everyone contributes something of themselves to helping other people. A suggestion: It would be tremendously uplifting to be able to see a written record of good deeds performed by the people who make up the class of ’59.
Due to some health problems I won’t be able to attend the 50th festivities in Buffalo. But I will feel included and will derive great pleasure from learning about all of my (to quote Carla) mates
with permission to copy- ANSWERS TO WHO WE ARE NOW
I will attempt to provide some answers to the questions sent to me about how my life has changed since graduating from Bennett High School 50 years ago next June. Gosh does that sound ominous.
Name: Marty Schaefer Residence: Golden Valley, MN a suburb of Minneapolis, we’ve lived here for 5 years Family Members: Wife, Chris, 3 blended family children, all adult, no grandchildren, one cat named Delores. Affiliations; National Hospice and Palliative Care Association, boards of directors of several non profit organizations.
Occupations: Professor of Psychology, Director of Human Services at a New York State community college, Executive Director of hospice programs in three states, Regional Director, American Diabetes Association, and most recently retired from my last position, Executive Director, American Academy of Neurology Foundation.
Avocation: Traveling, sports, including swimming, tennis, golf and I ran a marathon once, it seemed as if it took my 5 weeks to finish it. Marginally a technophile, a foodie who needs to watch caloric and fat intake. I am addicted to TV and internet news, sports, ESPN, the New York Times, the Washington Post, CNN and MSNBC. I get a little sick watching Fox News at times.
Values important to me in roughly rank order include: Health and well being Love Time with family and friendships Integrity Personal Fitness Communication Volunteering Sincerity Travel Community Continuing education and personal growth Environment Material possessions Winning, whatever that means. Is this like “success in Iraq”?
I have not kept up as well as I like with old friends, and, at times, the Buffalo Bills
Hopes and dreams: Include health and happiness for my family, children, friends. I would love to see a world that is more tolerant of others, free from discrimination, with opportunities for all people to advance and be comfortable should they desire this. Triumphs: Working productively I professional settings for over 40 years hopefully making a difference in the lives of those people for whom the missions of the organizations were developed and implemented.
Regrets: Not being able to fully achieve all that I set out to achieve but getting almost there does help. Botching some relationships with people which produced hurt and disappointment.
Strengths: Sense of humor, hard working, innovative, and living with the motto: “never let a generous impulse pass you by”
Accomplishments: Being awarded the New York State Chancellor of Education Award For Excellence in Teaching, developing and implementing hospice programs and educating staff, community members, clergy, physicians on palliative, hospice care.
Definition of Success: “The road to success is paved by well-handled mistakes”
Midlife crisis: Looking at the mirror and realizing I am beyond mid life and on a slippery slope in a downward progression. But at least I am not like a patient for whom a nurse used this description of his condition; “ He is circling the drain”. So you see it could be much worse for me.
How have I changed in 50 years? Probably not too much. The things I enjoyed doing 50 years ago I still try to do, albeit with less vigor. The things I laughed at then, I laugh at now, and the stuff to make me sad then still causes sadness now. It was important to try to make folks happy then as it is for me now.
Gifts I have received: Support, love, understanding, encouragement, friendship
Gift I gave: I had the opportunity to donate a kidney to save the life of a then brother-in-law in 1982.
Thankful to Bennett: I am thankful for the friendships and the Bennett High School community. I am thankful for some interesting teachers, for the Bob Wells Assemblies for Drivers Ed and for Adam Dzimian. Most of all I am glad I went to Bennett High as those days there were really not capable of be replicated by anything I experienced since my graduation in 1959.
Motto: I thought our motto was “The best is yet to be”
Pet Peeve: Inconsiderate people, people who deliberately disappoint others to get ahead, people who put themselves first.
I dance to all types of music, discounting the polka, like books dealing with biographies, the one about Warren Buffett, The Snowball is pretty interesting, I enjoy listening to classical music.
Addiction: I have no addictions as I gave up nicotine in 1981, but I do have trouble staying away from ice cream, rhubarb pie and the occasional wine.
My memory is still good and I am reasonably content, fulfilled and optimistic, although I am writing this to you in the midst of a tumbling stock market which is now becoming one of my greatest pet peeves, see above answer.
with permission to copy...Slyvia is what my late lamented brother, Danny, used to call Sylvia Fleck Abrams (He died in 95 of a brain tumor. He was 49. Sigh) How can I sum up? I live in Inverness, Ca, a beautiful village on a salt water bay, an inlet of the Pacific, surrounded by the Pt. Reyes National Sea Shore about an hour northof San Francisco in a community of artists writers musicians, dairy farmersand others who contribute to life as we know it....a great book store,some terrific places to get dinner etc. There¹s an organic dairy and a brilliantly crafted cheese market, fresh oysters, abalone and wild salmon....I pick blackberries and turn them into cordial ( I¹m a moon-shiner! ).I have an adorable daughter,30, who just graduated from Vet school who is living in the East Bay and doing a grueling but stimulating internship. I¹m a divorcee of many years just renewing my interest in meeting someone, though my idea of a hunk has been somewhat modified by the inevitable slippage and gravity. I¹ve just retired from Sonoma State where I¹ve been an English Prof for the last 15 years... went back east to SUNY Albany in 89 to do a doctorate...completed in 92. Before that, I had a checkered but fulfilling career as a photographer, columnist, art reviewer, chef, caterer etc, but they were all day jobs to support my writing habit. I¹ve sailed to Mexico from our bay in a 36 foot cutter, traveled elsewhere, been a radio programmer on a local station of which I am a board member, have a garden. Love to cook sing dance...love as well being a Mom and community member. I'm keeping my hand in and the $ coming in by teaching 2 classes at a community college a lot closer than SSU. I've had a column on the local paper the last six months: Now We Are Sixty which has been a kick and am now preparing to write a novel-ish something. My life has been unconventional, rewarding and swell! I took the road less traveled and am happy. That's as succinct and exhaustive as I can be.
Class of 1959 Bennett High School, Buffalo New York “To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield” Tennyson “Ulysses”
Name ? Douglas W. Craw Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)? Summerdale, AL (near Gulf Shores) in the winter, Grand Haven, MI in the summer How long have you lived there?Our house is in an RV community 5 miles from downtown Summerdale. We have owned the 1/2 acre lot since 1997, initially had 2 full hookup RV sites on the lot, built a house in 2006. We also have an apartment at our daughter's home in Grand Haven, which we have had since 2000.\ Family members? Wife Anna, Children Stephen (41), Martha (39), Grandchildren Emma (14), Benjamin (10) & Margaret (7)\\ Communities, affiliations, groups, societies (spiritual social cultural neighborhood ethnic professional)? Lifelong active member of the Lutheran Church (Missouri Synod) - various churches in the Buffalo & Detroit area and now Alabama. Occupation(s) ? Or if retired, previous?\ Do you consider your work a career, profession, business, job, or vocation? Worked for Ford Motor Company, Dearborn, MI (1964-1995), Material Control (plant & later staff positions) I considered work to be a job, which fortunately I enjoyed doing. But I was happiest to spend time with my family and was not a workaholic. Avocations ? Hobbies? Genealogy (now have a database approaching 10,000 individuals - all related) Have researched & found ancestors back to the 1200s Arts/ crafts? I continued my interest in vocal music that began at Bennett. I sang in several choirs in college (Valparaiso University) and toured Europe with the University Choir in the summer of 1962. I sang with the Ford Chorus (1972-1978) and the Detroit Lutheran Singers (1978-1991). While singing with the DLS we performed Beethoven's 9th Symphony in 1983 with the Detroit Symphony Orchestra under the baton of Antal Dorati - a high lite of my musical experiences. Have also sung in church choirs throughout my life & including the present time. Sports activelyengaged in? None Technophobe or technophile? Technophile Pack rat or minimalist? More a minimalist than a pack rat Traditionalist and or Avant Garde? Traditionalist Film buff? No How important are the various media in your life? Rarely read a newspaper; generally watch the nightly news (ABC) but get most of my news via the Internet How do you Define Success? Well - I certainly don't define a successful person as one who has the most money. I believe that a successful person is one who has a happy marriage and has raised their children to be independent, productive, active and thoughtful citizens of this great country. How did you get through “mid life crisis? Business as usual? bought a sports car? Took up Tango or skate boarding? Quite well I believe. I did have a bit of a late "mid life crisis" however - - last year I bought a long desired Miata sports car. HOW HAVE YOU CHANGED IN THE 50 YEARS SINCE GRADUATION? Not much - matured of course and more easy going now I think
.................................... What was the greatest gift you’ve received? My faith in Jesus Christ given to me by my parents through the church Given? Imparting the same faith in Jesus Christ to my children & grandchildren Sources of inspiration? Early teachers - especially my 2nd and 6th grade teachers Pet Peeves and Disgruntlements? Drivers who refuse to obey the speed limit especially in these times of high fuel prices when we all need to slow down and conserve fuel What types of music do you enjoy? Classical & Religious (vocal & pipe organ) Do you still like to Boogie: Jitterbug, Fox trot, Charleston etc? No - never did Do you still like the 50s? Yes - still the best decade for popular music! Please tell us about yourself . . .anything you want to share. After retirement my wife and I lived and traveled full-time in our motorhome(s) for 11 years. We have visited all 50 states (Alaska & Hawaii by cruise ship) and traveled over 225,000 miles visiting almost all the major National Parks and 40 state capitols. We have truly discovered what a beautiful country we have! During our travels in 2002 & 2003 we also built homes for Habitat For Humanity. How have we fared vis a vis addictions? Fortunately I have never smoked or done drugs, Have been and still am a social drinker, which I am happy to say has never gotten out of hand. My wife & I enjoy a glass of wine with dinner most every evening. Are you happy? Content? Fulfilled? Very happy & contented! I'm very fortunate to have had a wonderful life, starting with great parents & then a great wife (married 43 years) and 2 fine children - - and now blessed with 3 super grandkids!
I don't mean to let you all know how dumb I am but I am totally at a loss as to how to leave a comment aimed at one of the bloggers. Please send instructions on how we respond to a particular comment. I wanted to tell Bonnie Sandler..."WOW...WHAT A GAL!" so I guess she'll see it now, but I am at a loss as to how to navigate this blog. I notice that after Douglas Craw's comment there was a "post a comment" line but not after the other's. Thanks, Linda W
Am I doing something wrong or is nobody adding to this blog???? I keep checking and I don't see anything different so I am thinking that I am just not logging on correctly, please somebody post something that tells me IF I am doing this right or wrong? Our classmate Marty Packard is pretty ill and I know he'd love to hear from some of his old friends. If any of you want his land address let me know..he doesn't do the computer much these days but said he'd love a phone call or snail mail
Ok, here I am, it's now 12/27 and I last posted in November and asked if I'm doing something wrong as I can't see anything on the blog beyond what I wrote. Since it's still the last thing I see I have to guess that I AM doing something wrong, so will somebody please come to my rescue and tell me how to navigate this and see what my classmates are posting?????? I can't believe NOBODY wrote since then, so it HAS to be me...HELP!
Hi Linda. I know when I click on starting the blog, then show the post this is what I get. I don't think there has been any postings for a while. I think some people are using email directly to communicate. Elaine
Thanks for answering...I had just about given up. Am now in touch with Barbara Moss ....we're having a fun time on e-mail....she's been living about a 3 miles from me all these years! Go figure! Does anyone know if Robert Wald has been located for the reunion?
Hello everyone, Diane Brothman Coveny signing in. I would like to write about Marcia Cole Gintzler.
Marcia died in September of 2003, after a brave battle with cancer. When Marcia died, we had been friends for 54 years. We met on the corner of North Drive and Cunard every morning of HS to walk to the bus and met after class each day to take the bus home, When we were really ambitious we would walk all the way to school (okay, so we did that maybe twice). We also went to Buffalo State and whenever possible rode together.
Marcia left 2 sons, Douglas and Jonathan, her husband David, (class of '58), and the world not as bright without her. She enjoyed cooking, traveling, skiing, reading and art. While in Buffalo, Marcia taught Art in Pembroke. In 1968 Marcia moved to Hopkington, NH . She and David owned a very successful silkscreen business in Concord, NH.
When Marcia first moved to NH, I moved to Nashville, TN with my husband Tom, who was earning his Doctorate. In 1972 Tom was offered a job in NH and I called Marcia for housing tips etc. We ended up 3 miles apart! We began aerobics classes almost immediately, and we took a Pottery class together. We went to lectures and museums, often taking our children. In 1974 Marcia and I began to run for exercise. We would meet 3-4 mornings a week and run anywhere from 2-4 miles. We continued to do this up until the time Marcia became ill. We walked when she could. Our mouths never stopped working no matter what we did.
Marcia will be at the Reunion in spirit. She is deeply missed.
As for me, I am retired from Education with a Masters in Reading. Before we left Buffalo, I had the opportunity to teach at PS 66. Some of the ‘old’ teachers were still there. It was incredibly odd to walk those halls as an adult.
I taught elementary school in a small community nestled in the foothills of the White Mountains and then rounded out my career as a Reading Teacher for the Junior/Senior High School in the same district.
I have published articles on reading and lead workshops for Educators with a former Professor of mine.
I have two daughters: Sandra and Jennifer, both living on the West Coast and both actively involved in environmental issues. They are incredibly bright, strong, independent women! I have two fabulous grandchildren, Kiyomi and Adin. I live in a house built by my husband Tom. I work as a Studio Potter in an octagon shaped barn, also built by my husband. Our dishes and serving pieces were all made by me.
Living in the woods in New Hampshire is far different than the life I led in Buffalo. Big city life is two hours away, Boston, or, five hours away to NYC. We snowshoe in the winter and ice skate when the lakes are frozen. Survival is interesting when it reaches 35 below zero. The school district I worked in had a winter rule that if the temperatures were zero or below, there would be no recess! Winters up here are more severe than any we experienced in Buffalo--but we have so many days when the sky is bright blue and the air crisp and clear--I love it!!!
I have continued to run, but now it’s more of a jog. I have been part of a team in two triathlons and have completed three century rides on my road bike (that’s 100 miles). My retirement is filled with travel, quilting, exercise and finding joy each and every day. I am looking forward to renewing old friendships and cultivating new ones. I find it hard to believe it has been 50 years. In my mind it was a short while ago.
Diane, as always you did an OUTSTANDING job in remembering Marcia. I'm glad you did it and it is so well said. You made your life journey with Marcia very vivid for us all, as well as your own life. I know that we all feel for you in your loss of a lifelong friend. Unlike most of our classmates I've had the chance to see you and delight in reuning with you ( is there such a word?) and I know how much fun the rest are about to have with you!
Hi everyone.I'm so happy to be back in contact. I loved reading responses comments meditations, tributes and memories. Thank you. I am looking forward to our reunion with great anticipation. Carla
I can't believe nobody has used this space since the reuinion! I guess since that is the case that nobody will read what I have to say. That's too bad. I'd love to hear people's reactions to the reunion. I had many! But first and foremost we all owe a HUGE thank you to all those who organized it so well, and a special thank you to Judy who did all the communicating so faithfully and responded to everyone's queries and requests and all that.
A friend sent me this and I thought it was appropriate. THE CLASS REUNION
Every ten years, as summertime nears, An announcement arrives in the mail, A reunion is planned; it'll be really grand; Make plans to attend without fail.
I'll never forget the first time we met; We tried so hard to impress. We drove fancy cars, smoked big cigars, And wore our most elegant dress.
It was quite an affair; the whole class was there. It was held at a fancy hotel. We wined, and we dined, and we acted refined, And everyone thought it was swell.
The men all conversed about who had been first To achieve great fortune and fame. Meanwhile, their spouses described their fine houses And how beautiful their children became.
The homecoming queen, who once had been lean, Now weighed in at one-ninety-six. The jocks who were there had all lost their hair, And the cheerleaders could no longer do kicks.
No one had heard about the class nerd Who'd guided a spacecraft to the moon; Or poor little Jane, who's always been plain; She married a shipping tycoon.
The boy we'd decreed 'most apt to succeed' Was serving ten years in the pen, While the one voted 'least' now was a priest; Just shows you can be wrong now and then.
They awarded a prize to one of the guys Who seemed to have aged the least. Another was given to the grad who had driven The farthest to attend the feast.
They took a class picture, a curious mixture Of beehives, crew cuts and wide ties. Tall, short, or skinny, the style was the mini; You never saw so many thighs.
At our next get-together, no one cared whether They impressed their classmates or not. The mood was informal, a whole lot more normal; By this time we'd all gone to pot.
It was held out-of-doors, at the lake shores; We ate hamburgers, coleslaw, and beans. Then most of us lay around in the shade, In our comfortable T-shirts and jeans.
By the fiftieth year, it was abundantly clear, We were definitely over the hill. Those who weren't dead had to crawl out of bed, And be home in time for their pill.
And now I can't wait; they've set the date; Our 55th is coming, I'm told. It should be a ball, they've rented a hall At the Shady Rest Home for the old.
Repairs have been made on my hearing aid; My pacemaker's been turned up on high. My wheelchair is oiled, and my teeth have been boiled; And I've bought a new wig and glass eye.
I'm feeling quite hearty, and I'm ready to party I'm gonna dance 'til dawn's early light. It'll be lots of fun; But I just hope that there's one Other person who can make it that night.
21 comments:
Hi Bennett Bloggers,
Just a quick hello and I am looking forward to many additions to this blog. Thanks Elaine for setting it up. Can you believe 50 years have flown by? I'm not any older, are you? It's funny how I can remember events from 50 years ago and yet what happened last week is a blur. So many memories have been awakened just by reading and responding to the e-mails I have gotten lately from some old friends. Stay well, happy and safe.
Eva (There were only 2 Eva's in the class of '59)
Hi All,
First, kudos to Elaine for making this blog happen. I've been part of a couple of email strings started because of the reunion and connected with a few friends of yesteryear. What a lot of fun. The nostalgia is overwhelming. I very seldom look at the numbers that signify the years that have gone by and when I see 50 and then my own 66 it seems bizarre. My mind thinks I'm still 29, though my body tells me the truth.
I'm not sure just how to jump in so I'm going to watch as this begins to develop and then it is going to be wonderful to start to reconnect with some wonderful friends.
Herm (Eva, there was only one Hermie in the class of '59):)
Hi Everybody,
This is a WONDERFUL idea and I thank Elaine so much for setting this up. I have really enjoyed hearing from so many classmates after all of these years. I can't wait for the reunion next July. It seems hard to believe that it is only 10 months from now. We started the planning about a year ago. Will be in touch. Judy Zent Deck
Hi everyone, Thanks for the nice words, but I have to give the credit to my husband, He is the computer geru in the family and everytime I need help he does it (which doesn't help me learn what to do). I have been wroking on the reunion committee and it has been fun renewing old friendships. Hope more will be joining this venue for the discussions. oh-Go Bills!! Elaine
Hello Class of '59. I'm just back from the Bris of my newest grandchild and found this waiting for me. I'm not even sure how to "get into" a blog, but I'm enjoying hearing everything from all who've written. Thank you Elaine's husband and much thanks to Carla for starting the whole communications thing in the first place.
Linda Weiss Baruch
BONNIE SANDLER FEINMAN
Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)?
San Diego CA
How long have you lived there?
32 years
Family members?
Husband – Harvey married 48 years
Children – Susan age 45, married, Pharm. D. U of Stockton (CA) met her husband in pharmacy school. Lives in CA near Sacramento. 2 daughters ages 14 and 9 years.
Diane age 43, married abd Ancient Near East Studies, grad schools Harvard and Brandeis. Lives near Boston where she helps with husband’s opthamology practice. 1 son and 2 daughters ages 9, 6, and 4 years.
Nancy age 41, single, is dating regularly and says she likes her single life. (that’s just fine with mom and dad). Master’s in Human Resource Mgt. from Boston U. Lives near San Diego. Works for Hewlett Packard.
Communities, Affiliations, Occupations etc.
The first year I moved to San Diego I became VP of the local NOW chapter. Although I remain a feminist, that early experience gave me a clear view of the imperfections and ironies of human motives; e.g. NOW members who were ongoing victims of spousal abuse, internal power and status conflicts, lack of recognition (at the time – 1976) of ethnic and cultural differences (values reflected a narrow middle class white focus).
While still living in Williamsville, at age 30 with 3 kids I had returned to school at SUNYAB for my master’s degree in Counseling Education. I had a great part time job at the University’s Adult Counseling Center where I counseled individuals and groups regarding the adjustments required of adults returning to school (I knew this subject well from personal experience.)
In San Diego, I created a course for women who wanted or needed to return to the job market after being at home for a period of time. The course ran intermittently for several years through the Adult Education Dept at UCSD in La Jolla and involved vocational testing, resume prep, and practical advice from guest speakers. It was a great activity for me as a
Page 2 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
new resident of the area. I met many interesting people while researching and choosing appropriate speakers.
I have had several careers over the years. In the 1970’s and 80’s I worked in the Jewish Community; first at the JCC with senior adults (who knew I would get there myself so fast?). Then as area director of the local American Jewish Committee chapter which was in shambles at the time. I managed to build it up, a proud achievement which maintains to this day. I also managed to burn myself out and took some time off.
One activity that I continued was my participation as co-founder and ass’t director of The Woman’s Institute for Continuing Jewish Education. This was the brainchild and doctoral project of my friend Irene Fine. Through the auspices of the JCC we taught and arranged classes on religious and secular topics of interest to Jewish women. Our highlight was our annual series of 3 Saturday (Shabbat) afternoon study sessions each with a different Jewish woman scholar. The Woman’s Institute published original prayerbooks, hosted an interfaith conference with the U of San Diego (a Catholic university) on female images of God, and created and published new ceremonies that recognized the lifecycle events important to Jewish women, I myself with Irene’s guidance wrote and presented to 100 women, a midlife ceremony when I turned 40 (so young! I think now). This ceremony is mentioned in a book by Letty Cottin Pogrebin, “Getting Over Getting Older’”. Having achieved it’s goals of actively involving women in their own spiritual lives, the Institute was retired after 25 years with printed materials archived in the Jewish Studies dep’t of San Diego State University.
I went back to work in 1990 as an outreach worker for a private foster care program which was part of a multi-service agency that served needy kids. The foster care program was contracted with the county but offered a higher level of care for hard to place children. These were kids who had bounced around the system, had behavior problems, and/or physical disabilities. We were licensed by the state and were reimbursed at a higher rate than the county. This allowed us to provided better training and supervision of foster parents, psychological therapy and other services for the kids. I became director of the program in 1991 with a staff of 30, 100 kids in placement and 50 foster families. Gradually I became frustrated with some agency policies that were imposing on the quality of services. I decided to form my own little non-profit, got a board together, got licensed, and persuaded 2 social workers and a secretary to come with me. The new program was called Special Families. It was financed by my truly wonderful husband. After 2 years we were just starting to become financially independent when I got an unsolicited offer from another agency to buy out Special Families. This offered an opportunity to return all of my husband’s hard-earned money and also provide in-house services to our kids which we had been out-sourcing. My board approved the merger and I went to work for the new agency as director of foster care and a small non-public school for behaviorally challenged kids. It was satisfying and exhausting and I finally retired in 2000.
Continuing education\personal growth
As a retiree I decided to earn the Ph.D I always wanted. A neighbor who was a retired professor suggested that I look into online programs and mentioned Walden University. I researched this and when I found that there was a (loose) connection to a recognized regular university (Indiana U) I signed on. For 3 years I studied public policy online and at seminars at IU and other locations. I did well, enjoyed the work and learned a lot…especially about the work I had been doing in foster care. I finished all of the coursework and began the process of choosing my dissertation topic etc. I found that I had a lot of resistance and couldn’t seem to get it to flow. I knew generally who I needed to hook up with locally to gather research material. They were people I knew and liked, and still I just couldn’t work up my enthusiasm. I finally did something I had never done. I quit! And it was ok, really ok.
Page 3 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
I got what I needed and now I was ready to read a book for pleasure, play on my computer, swim as often as I liked, experiment with healthy cooking, lunch with friends etc. I’m still enjoying life!
What was the greatest gift you’ve received?
Many. I have been very fortunate. First a great spouse who rode the ups and downs with me (and vice versa). 3 intelligent, productive daughters all with a highly developed sense of humor. And they care about people and the world around them. I’m very proud. An enquiring mind. I’m curious. I love to learn. I am able to change and grow although this can be painful sometimes.
This natural tendency I have to play out my life issues through my volunteer and work activities: (for ex.)
• The limits placed on women I saw as I was growing up
• The ability to use my anguish over losing a parent early by understanding the problems that foster kids have and actually doing something about those problems.
And of course I am so fortunate to be living in weather paradise after putting in over 30 years in the cold tundra of Buffalo! (although Buffalo will always be home to me).
You have Bennett to be thankful for what?
I went to Bennett at a difficult time in my personal life. Bennett gave me a normalcy I didn’t feel at home. I was proud to go to Bennett which was respected academically and provided extra goodies like Bob Wells and the surprise assemblies with a celebrity thrown in. I was comfortably surrounded by friends and familiar faces. The Tiger’s football games provided excitement and feelings of belonging. I knew who I was at Bennett and where I fit in. Even after all these years I still feel lucky to be a Bennett alum. When you meet someone who went to Bennett even in different years, there is an instant connection. I talk to other people and don’t often see this level of affection and connection I and so many others have with BHS.
Has our motto been significant in your life?
“The Best is Yet to Be”. Yes. I am the kind of person who sees the glass half full. I guess I can say that I have lived optimistically; trying to find my way around problems. Not to sound Pollyanna – ish because I have had my miserable times. But I do believe that you need to keep going; to continue to love and learn in order to really live. With global warming, a sinking economy, high fuel prices etc. the only way to survive is to think that the best is yet to be.
WHAT SHOULD WE AS A CLASS HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH?
There is a Hebrew word, “teshuvah” which introduces the concept of healing the world. Does this world need healing? Of course! It may sound like an impossible task but all it takes is for people to come together for the purpose of helping. Whether it’s the BHS Alumni Association that helps today’s students or another affiliation, large or small, it is imperative that everyone contributes something of themselves to helping other people. A suggestion: It would be tremendously uplifting to be able to see a written record of good deeds performed by the people who make up the class of ’59.
Due to some health problems I won’t be able to attend the 50th festivities in Buffalo. But I will feel included and will derive great pleasure from learning about all of my (to quote Carla) mates
BONNIE SANDLER FEINMAN
Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)?
San Diego CA
How long have you lived there?
32 years
Family members?
Husband – Harvey married 48 years
Children – Susan age 45, married, Pharm. D. U of Stockton (CA) met her husband in pharmacy school. Lives in CA near Sacramento. 2 daughters ages 14 and 9 years.
Diane age 43, married abd Ancient Near East Studies, grad schools Harvard and Brandeis. Lives near Boston where she helps with husband’s opthamology practice. 1 son and 2 daughters ages 9, 6, and 4 years.
Nancy age 41, single, is dating regularly and says she likes her single life. (that’s just fine with mom and dad). Master’s in Human Resource Mgt. from Boston U. Lives near San Diego. Works for Hewlett Packard.
Communities, Affiliations, Occupations etc.
The first year I moved to San Diego I became VP of the local NOW chapter. Although I remain a feminist, that early experience gave me a clear view of the imperfections and ironies of human motives; e.g. NOW members who were ongoing victims of spousal abuse, internal power and status conflicts, lack of recognition (at the time – 1976) of ethnic and cultural differences (values reflected a narrow middle class white focus).
While still living in Williamsville, at age 30 with 3 kids I had returned to school at SUNYAB for my master’s degree in Counseling Education. I had a great part time job at the University’s Adult Counseling Center where I counseled individuals and groups regarding the adjustments required of adults returning to school (I knew this subject well from personal experience.)
In San Diego, I created a course for women who wanted or needed to return to the job market after being at home for a period of time. The course ran intermittently for several years through the Adult Education Dept at UCSD in La Jolla and involved vocational testing, resume prep, and practical advice from guest speakers. It was a great activity for me as a
Page 2 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
new resident of the area. I met many interesting people while researching and choosing appropriate speakers.
I have had several careers over the years. In the 1970’s and 80’s I worked in the Jewish Community; first at the JCC with senior adults (who knew I would get there myself so fast?). Then as area director of the local American Jewish Committee chapter which was in shambles at the time. I managed to build it up, a proud achievement which maintains to this day. I also managed to burn myself out and took some time off.
One activity that I continued was my participation as co-founder and ass’t director of The Woman’s Institute for Continuing Jewish Education. This was the brainchild and doctoral project of my friend Irene Fine. Through the auspices of the JCC we taught and arranged classes on religious and secular topics of interest to Jewish women. Our highlight was our annual series of 3 Saturday (Shabbat) afternoon study sessions each with a different Jewish woman scholar. The Woman’s Institute published original prayerbooks, hosted an interfaith conference with the U of San Diego (a Catholic university) on female images of God, and created and published new ceremonies that recognized the lifecycle events important to Jewish women, I myself with Irene’s guidance wrote and presented to 100 women, a midlife ceremony when I turned 40 (so young! I think now). This ceremony is mentioned in a book by Letty Cottin Pogrebin, “Getting Over Getting Older’”. Having achieved it’s goals of actively involving women in their own spiritual lives, the Institute was retired after 25 years with printed materials archived in the Jewish Studies dep’t of San Diego State University.
I went back to work in 1990 as an outreach worker for a private foster care program which was part of a multi-service agency that served needy kids. The foster care program was contracted with the county but offered a higher level of care for hard to place children. These were kids who had bounced around the system, had behavior problems, and/or physical disabilities. We were licensed by the state and were reimbursed at a higher rate than the county. This allowed us to provided better training and supervision of foster parents, psychological therapy and other services for the kids. I became director of the program in 1991 with a staff of 30, 100 kids in placement and 50 foster families. Gradually I became frustrated with some agency policies that were imposing on the quality of services. I decided to form my own little non-profit, got a board together, got licensed, and persuaded 2 social workers and a secretary to come with me. The new program was called Special Families. It was financed by my truly wonderful husband. After 2 years we were just starting to become financially independent when I got an unsolicited offer from another agency to buy out Special Families. This offered an opportunity to return all of my husband’s hard-earned money and also provide in-house services to our kids which we had been out-sourcing. My board approved the merger and I went to work for the new agency as director of foster care and a small non-public school for behaviorally challenged kids. It was satisfying and exhausting and I finally retired in 2000.
Continuing education\personal growth
As a retiree I decided to earn the Ph.D I always wanted. A neighbor who was a retired professor suggested that I look into online programs and mentioned Walden University. I researched this and when I found that there was a (loose) connection to a recognized regular university (Indiana U) I signed on. For 3 years I studied public policy online and at seminars at IU and other locations. I did well, enjoyed the work and learned a lot…especially about the work I had been doing in foster care. I finished all of the coursework and began the process of choosing my dissertation topic etc. I found that I had a lot of resistance and couldn’t seem to get it to flow. I knew generally who I needed to hook up with locally to gather research material. They were people I knew and liked, and still I just couldn’t work up my enthusiasm. I finally did something I had never done. I quit! And it was ok, really ok.
Page 3 – Bonnie Sandler Feinman/Class of ‘59
I got what I needed and now I was ready to read a book for pleasure, play on my computer, swim as often as I liked, experiment with healthy cooking, lunch with friends etc. I’m still enjoying life!
What was the greatest gift you’ve received?
Many. I have been very fortunate. First a great spouse who rode the ups and downs with me (and vice versa). 3 intelligent, productive daughters all with a highly developed sense of humor. And they care about people and the world around them. I’m very proud. An enquiring mind. I’m curious. I love to learn. I am able to change and grow although this can be painful sometimes.
This natural tendency I have to play out my life issues through my volunteer and work activities: (for ex.)
• The limits placed on women I saw as I was growing up
• The ability to use my anguish over losing a parent early by understanding the problems that foster kids have and actually doing something about those problems.
And of course I am so fortunate to be living in weather paradise after putting in over 30 years in the cold tundra of Buffalo! (although Buffalo will always be home to me).
You have Bennett to be thankful for what?
I went to Bennett at a difficult time in my personal life. Bennett gave me a normalcy I didn’t feel at home. I was proud to go to Bennett which was respected academically and provided extra goodies like Bob Wells and the surprise assemblies with a celebrity thrown in. I was comfortably surrounded by friends and familiar faces. The Tiger’s football games provided excitement and feelings of belonging. I knew who I was at Bennett and where I fit in. Even after all these years I still feel lucky to be a Bennett alum. When you meet someone who went to Bennett even in different years, there is an instant connection. I talk to other people and don’t often see this level of affection and connection I and so many others have with BHS.
Has our motto been significant in your life?
“The Best is Yet to Be”. Yes. I am the kind of person who sees the glass half full. I guess I can say that I have lived optimistically; trying to find my way around problems. Not to sound Pollyanna – ish because I have had my miserable times. But I do believe that you need to keep going; to continue to love and learn in order to really live. With global warming, a sinking economy, high fuel prices etc. the only way to survive is to think that the best is yet to be.
WHAT SHOULD WE AS A CLASS HOPE TO ACCOMPLISH?
There is a Hebrew word, “teshuvah” which introduces the concept of healing the world. Does this world need healing? Of course! It may sound like an impossible task but all it takes is for people to come together for the purpose of helping. Whether it’s the BHS Alumni Association that helps today’s students or another affiliation, large or small, it is imperative that everyone contributes something of themselves to helping other people. A suggestion: It would be tremendously uplifting to be able to see a written record of good deeds performed by the people who make up the class of ’59.
Due to some health problems I won’t be able to attend the 50th festivities in Buffalo. But I will feel included and will derive great pleasure from learning about all of my (to quote Carla) mates
with permission to copy-
ANSWERS TO WHO WE ARE NOW
I will attempt to provide some answers to the questions sent to me about how my life has changed since graduating from Bennett High School 50 years ago next June. Gosh does that sound ominous.
Name: Marty Schaefer
Residence: Golden Valley, MN a suburb of Minneapolis, we’ve lived here for 5 years
Family Members: Wife, Chris, 3 blended family children, all adult, no grandchildren, one cat named Delores.
Affiliations; National Hospice and Palliative Care Association, boards of directors of several non profit organizations.
Occupations: Professor of Psychology, Director of Human Services at a New York State community college, Executive Director of hospice programs in three states, Regional Director, American Diabetes Association, and most recently retired from my last position, Executive Director, American Academy of Neurology Foundation.
Avocation: Traveling, sports, including swimming, tennis, golf and I ran a marathon once, it seemed as if it took my 5 weeks to finish it.
Marginally a technophile, a foodie who needs to watch caloric and fat intake.
I am addicted to TV and internet news, sports, ESPN, the New York Times, the Washington Post, CNN and MSNBC. I get a little sick watching Fox News at times.
Values important to me in roughly rank order include:
Health and well being
Love
Time with family and friendships
Integrity
Personal Fitness
Communication
Volunteering
Sincerity
Travel
Community
Continuing education and personal growth
Environment
Material possessions
Winning, whatever that means. Is this like “success in Iraq”?
I have not kept up as well as I like with old friends, and, at times, the Buffalo Bills
Hopes and dreams: Include health and happiness for my family, children, friends. I would love to see a world that is more tolerant of others, free from discrimination, with opportunities for all people to advance and be comfortable should they desire this.
Triumphs: Working productively I professional settings for over 40 years hopefully making a difference in the lives of those people for whom the missions of the organizations were developed and implemented.
Regrets: Not being able to fully achieve all that I set out to achieve but getting almost there does help. Botching some relationships with people which produced hurt and disappointment.
Strengths: Sense of humor, hard working, innovative, and living with the motto: “never let a generous impulse pass you by”
Accomplishments: Being awarded the New York State Chancellor of Education Award For Excellence in Teaching, developing and implementing hospice programs and educating staff, community members, clergy, physicians on palliative, hospice care.
Definition of Success: “The road to success is paved by well-handled mistakes”
Midlife crisis: Looking at the mirror and realizing I am beyond mid life and on a slippery slope in a downward progression. But at least I am not like a patient for whom a nurse used this description of his condition; “ He is circling the drain”. So you see it could be much worse for me.
How have I changed in 50 years?
Probably not too much. The things I enjoyed doing 50 years ago I still try to do, albeit with less vigor. The things I laughed at then, I laugh at now, and the stuff to make me sad then still causes sadness now. It was important to try to make folks happy then as it is for me now.
Gifts I have received: Support, love, understanding, encouragement, friendship
Gift I gave: I had the opportunity to donate a kidney to save the life of a then brother-in-law in 1982.
Thankful to Bennett: I am thankful for the friendships and the Bennett High School community. I am thankful for some interesting teachers, for the Bob Wells Assemblies for Drivers Ed and for Adam Dzimian. Most of all I am glad I went to Bennett High as those days there were really not capable of be replicated by anything I experienced since my graduation in 1959.
Motto: I thought our motto was “The best is yet to be”
Pet Peeve: Inconsiderate people, people who deliberately disappoint others to get ahead, people who put themselves first.
I dance to all types of music, discounting the polka, like books dealing with biographies, the one about Warren Buffett, The Snowball is pretty interesting, I enjoy listening to classical music.
Addiction: I have no addictions as I gave up nicotine in 1981, but I do have trouble staying away from ice cream, rhubarb pie and the occasional wine.
My memory is still good and I am reasonably content, fulfilled and optimistic, although I am writing this to you in the midst of a tumbling stock market which is now becoming one of my greatest pet peeves, see above answer.
with permission to copy...Slyvia is what my late lamented brother, Danny, used to call Sylvia Fleck
Abrams (He died in 95 of a brain tumor. He was 49. Sigh)
How can I sum up?
I live in Inverness, Ca, a beautiful village on a salt water bay, an inlet
of the Pacific, surrounded by the Pt. Reyes National Sea Shore about an hour
northof San Francisco in a community of artists writers musicians, dairy
farmersand others who contribute to life as we know it....a great book
store,some terrific places to get dinner etc. There¹s an organic dairy and a
brilliantly crafted cheese market, fresh oysters, abalone and wild
salmon....I pick blackberries and turn them into cordial ( I¹m a
moon-shiner! ).I have an adorable daughter,30, who just graduated from Vet
school who is living in the East Bay and doing a grueling but stimulating
internship. I¹m a divorcee of many years just renewing my interest in
meeting someone, though my idea of a hunk has been somewhat modified by the
inevitable slippage and gravity. I¹ve just retired from Sonoma State where
I¹ve been an English Prof for the last 15 years... went back east to SUNY
Albany in 89 to do a doctorate...completed in 92. Before that, I had a
checkered but fulfilling career as a photographer, columnist, art reviewer,
chef, caterer etc, but they were all day jobs to support my writing habit.
I¹ve sailed to Mexico from our bay in a 36 foot cutter, traveled elsewhere,
been a radio programmer on a local station of which I am a board member,
have a garden. Love to cook sing dance...love as well being a Mom and
community member. I'm keeping my hand in and the $ coming in by teaching 2
classes at a community college a lot closer than SSU. I've had a column on
the local paper the last six months: Now We Are Sixty which has been a kick
and am now preparing to write a novel-ish something. My life has been
unconventional, rewarding and swell! I took the road less traveled and am
happy. That's as succinct and exhaustive as I can be.
with permission to print
Class of 1959 Bennett High School, Buffalo New York
“To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield”
Tennyson “Ulysses”
Name ? Douglas W. Craw
Place of residence (city, suburb, rural village)? Summerdale, AL (near Gulf Shores) in the winter, Grand Haven, MI in the summer
How long have you lived there?Our house is in an RV community 5 miles from downtown Summerdale. We have owned the 1/2 acre lot since 1997, initially had 2 full hookup RV sites on the lot, built a house in 2006. We also have an apartment at our daughter's home in Grand Haven, which we have had since 2000.\
Family members?
Wife Anna, Children Stephen (41), Martha (39), Grandchildren Emma (14), Benjamin (10) & Margaret (7)\\
Communities, affiliations, groups, societies (spiritual social cultural neighborhood ethnic professional)?
Lifelong active member of the Lutheran Church (Missouri Synod) - various churches in the Buffalo & Detroit area and now Alabama.
Occupation(s) ? Or if retired, previous?\
Do you consider your work a career, profession, business, job, or vocation? Worked for Ford Motor Company, Dearborn, MI (1964-1995), Material Control (plant & later staff positions) I considered work to be a job, which fortunately I enjoyed doing. But I was happiest to
spend time with my family and was not a workaholic.
Avocations ? Hobbies?
Genealogy (now have a database approaching 10,000 individuals - all related) Have researched &
found ancestors back to the 1200s
Arts/ crafts?
I continued my interest in vocal music that began at Bennett. I sang in several choirs in college (Valparaiso University) and toured Europe with the University Choir in the summer of 1962. I sang with the Ford Chorus (1972-1978) and the Detroit Lutheran Singers (1978-1991). While singing with the DLS we performed Beethoven's 9th Symphony in 1983 with the Detroit Symphony Orchestra under the baton of Antal Dorati - a high lite of my musical experiences. Have also sung in church choirs throughout my life & including the present time.
Sports activelyengaged in? None
Technophobe or
technophile? Technophile
Pack rat or minimalist? More a minimalist than a pack rat
Traditionalist and or Avant Garde? Traditionalist
Film buff? No
How important are the various media in your life?
Rarely read a newspaper; generally watch the nightly news (ABC) but get most of my news via the
Internet
How do you Define Success?
Well - I certainly don't define a successful person as one who has the most money. I believe that a
successful person is one who has a happy marriage and has raised their children to be independent,
productive, active and thoughtful citizens of this great country.
How did you get through “mid life crisis? Business as usual? bought a sports car? Took up Tango or skate boarding?
Quite well I believe. I did have a bit of a late "mid life crisis" however - - last year I bought a long
desired Miata sports car.
HOW HAVE YOU CHANGED IN THE 50 YEARS SINCE GRADUATION?
Not much - matured of course and more easy going now I think
....................................
What was the greatest gift you’ve received?
My faith in Jesus Christ given to me by my parents through the church
Given? Imparting the same faith in Jesus Christ to my children & grandchildren
Sources of inspiration? Early teachers - especially my 2nd and 6th grade teachers
Pet Peeves and Disgruntlements?
Drivers who refuse to obey the speed limit especially in these times of high fuel prices when we
all need to slow down and conserve fuel
What types of music do you enjoy? Classical & Religious (vocal & pipe organ)
Do you still like to Boogie: Jitterbug, Fox trot, Charleston etc? No - never did
Do you still like the 50s? Yes - still the best decade for popular music!
Please tell us about yourself . . .anything you want to share.
After retirement my wife and I lived and traveled full-time in our motorhome(s) for 11 years. We have
visited all 50 states (Alaska & Hawaii by cruise ship) and traveled over 225,000 miles visiting almost
all the major National Parks and 40 state capitols. We have truly discovered what a beautiful country
we have! During our travels in 2002 & 2003 we also built homes for Habitat For Humanity.
How have we fared vis a vis addictions?
Fortunately I have never smoked or done drugs, Have been and still am a social drinker, which I am
happy to say has never gotten out of hand. My wife & I enjoy a glass of wine with dinner most every
evening.
Are you happy? Content? Fulfilled?
Very happy & contented! I'm very fortunate to have had a wonderful life, starting with great parents &
then a great wife (married 43 years) and 2 fine children - - and now blessed with 3 super grandkids!
I don't mean to let you all know how dumb I am but I am totally at a loss as to how to leave a comment aimed at one of the bloggers. Please send instructions on how we respond to a particular comment. I wanted to tell Bonnie Sandler..."WOW...WHAT A GAL!" so I guess she'll see it now, but I am at a loss as to how to navigate this blog. I notice that after Douglas Craw's comment there was a "post a comment" line but not after the other's.
Thanks, Linda W
Eva, need new email address. Herm
Am I doing something wrong or is nobody adding to this blog???? I keep checking and I don't see anything different so I am thinking that I am just not logging on correctly, please somebody post something that tells me IF I am doing this right or wrong?
Our classmate Marty Packard is pretty ill and I know he'd love to hear from some of his old friends. If any of you want his land address let me know..he doesn't do the computer much these days but said he'd love a phone call or snail mail
Ok, here I am, it's now 12/27 and I last posted in November and asked if I'm doing something wrong as I can't see anything on the blog beyond what I wrote. Since it's still the last thing I see I have to guess that I AM doing something wrong, so will somebody please come to my rescue and tell me how to navigate this and see what my classmates are posting?????? I can't believe NOBODY wrote since then, so it HAS to be me...HELP!
Hi Linda. I know when I click on starting the blog, then show the post this is what I get. I don't think there has been any postings for a while. I think some people are using email directly to communicate. Elaine
Thanks for answering...I had just about given up. Am now in touch with Barbara Moss ....we're having a fun time on e-mail....she's been living about a 3 miles from me all these years! Go figure!
Does anyone know if Robert Wald has been located for the reunion?
Hello everyone, Diane Brothman Coveny signing in.
I would like to write about Marcia Cole Gintzler.
Marcia died in September of 2003, after a brave battle with cancer. When Marcia died, we had been friends for 54 years. We met on the corner of North Drive and Cunard every morning of HS to walk to the bus and met after class each day to take the bus home, When we were really ambitious we would walk all the way to school (okay, so we did that maybe twice). We also went to Buffalo State and whenever possible rode together.
Marcia left 2 sons, Douglas and Jonathan, her husband David, (class of '58), and the world not as bright without her. She enjoyed cooking, traveling, skiing, reading and art. While in Buffalo, Marcia taught Art in Pembroke. In 1968 Marcia moved to Hopkington, NH .
She and David owned a very successful silkscreen business in Concord, NH.
When Marcia first moved to NH, I moved to Nashville, TN with my husband Tom, who was earning his Doctorate. In 1972 Tom was offered a job in NH and I called Marcia for housing tips etc. We ended up 3 miles apart! We began aerobics classes almost immediately, and we took a Pottery class together. We went to lectures and museums, often taking our children. In 1974 Marcia and I began to run for exercise. We would meet 3-4 mornings a week and run anywhere from 2-4 miles. We continued to do this up until the time Marcia became ill. We walked when she could. Our mouths never stopped working no matter what we did.
Marcia will be at the Reunion in spirit. She is deeply missed.
As for me, I am retired from Education with a Masters in Reading. Before we left Buffalo, I had the opportunity to teach at PS 66. Some of the ‘old’ teachers were still there. It was incredibly odd to walk those halls as an adult.
I taught elementary school in a small community nestled in the foothills of the White Mountains and then rounded out my career as a Reading Teacher for the Junior/Senior High School in the same district.
I have published articles on reading and lead workshops for Educators with a former Professor of mine.
I have two daughters: Sandra and Jennifer, both living on the West Coast and both actively involved in environmental issues. They are incredibly bright, strong, independent women! I have two fabulous grandchildren, Kiyomi and Adin. I live in a house built by my husband Tom. I work as a Studio Potter in an octagon shaped barn, also built by my husband. Our dishes and serving pieces were all made by me.
Living in the woods in New Hampshire is far different than the life I led in Buffalo. Big city life is two hours away, Boston, or, five hours away to NYC. We snowshoe in the winter and ice skate when the lakes are frozen. Survival is interesting when it reaches 35 below zero. The school district I worked in had a winter rule that if the temperatures were zero or below, there would be no recess! Winters up here are more severe than any we experienced in Buffalo--but we have so many days when the sky is bright blue and the air crisp and clear--I love it!!!
I have continued to run, but now it’s more of a jog. I have been part of a team in two triathlons and have completed three century rides on my road bike (that’s 100 miles). My retirement is filled with travel, quilting, exercise and finding joy each and every day. I am looking forward to renewing old friendships and cultivating new ones. I find it hard to believe it has been 50 years. In my mind it was a short while ago.
Diane, as always you did an OUTSTANDING job in remembering Marcia. I'm glad you did it and it is so well said. You made your life journey with Marcia very vivid for us all, as well as your own life. I know that we all feel for you in your loss of a lifelong friend.
Unlike most of our classmates I've had the chance to see you and delight in reuning with you ( is there such a word?) and I know how much fun the rest are about to have with you!
Hi everyone.I'm so happy to be back in contact. I loved reading responses comments meditations, tributes and memories. Thank you. I am looking forward to our reunion with great anticipation. Carla
I can't believe nobody has used this space since the reuinion! I guess since that is the case that nobody will read what I have to say. That's too bad. I'd love to hear people's reactions to the reunion. I had many!
But first and foremost we all owe a HUGE thank you to all those who organized it so well, and a special thank you to Judy who did all the communicating so faithfully and responded to everyone's queries and requests and all that.
A friend sent me this and I thought it was appropriate.
THE CLASS REUNION
Every ten years, as summertime nears,
An announcement arrives in the mail,
A reunion is planned; it'll be really grand;
Make plans to attend without fail.
I'll never forget the first time we met;
We tried so hard to impress.
We drove fancy cars, smoked big cigars,
And wore our most elegant dress.
It was quite an affair; the whole class was there.
It was held at a fancy hotel.
We wined, and we dined, and we acted refined,
And everyone thought it was swell.
The men all conversed about who had been first
To achieve great fortune and fame.
Meanwhile, their spouses described their fine houses
And how beautiful their children became.
The homecoming queen, who once had been lean,
Now weighed in at one-ninety-six.
The jocks who were there had all lost their hair,
And the cheerleaders could no longer do kicks.
No one had heard about the class nerd
Who'd guided a spacecraft to the moon;
Or poor little Jane, who's always been plain;
She married a shipping tycoon.
The boy we'd decreed 'most apt to succeed'
Was serving ten years in the pen,
While the one voted 'least' now was a priest;
Just shows you can be wrong now and then.
They awarded a prize to one of the guys
Who seemed to have aged the least.
Another was given to the grad who had driven
The farthest to attend the feast.
They took a class picture, a curious mixture
Of beehives, crew cuts and wide ties.
Tall, short, or skinny, the style was the mini;
You never saw so many thighs.
At our next get-together, no one cared whether
They impressed their classmates or not.
The mood was informal, a whole lot more normal;
By this time we'd all gone to pot.
It was held out-of-doors, at the lake shores;
We ate hamburgers, coleslaw, and beans.
Then most of us lay around in the shade,
In our comfortable T-shirts and jeans.
By the fiftieth year, it was abundantly clear,
We were definitely over the hill.
Those who weren't dead had to crawl out of bed,
And be home in time for their pill.
And now I can't wait; they've set the date;
Our 55th is coming, I'm told.
It should be a ball, they've rented a hall
At the Shady Rest Home for the old.
Repairs have been made on my hearing aid;
My pacemaker's been turned up on high.
My wheelchair is oiled, and my teeth have been boiled;
And I've bought a new wig and glass eye.
I'm feeling quite hearty, and I'm ready to party
I'm gonna dance 'til dawn's early light.
It'll be lots of fun; But I just hope that there's one
Other person who can make it that night.
Author Unknown
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